Category: Stress Managmeent

Dec25

Joy is not the absence of pain, it’s the sacred acceptance of it

by Cheryl Brewster

Like you, I’ve experienced a lot of joy in my life, and a lot of pain. I recognize that both are integral dance partners, challenging assumptions and perceptions of reality.

JOY in my experience is the ever-present, inner quality of the soul, always in the background, and yet often expressing itself spontaneously and with great love. In fact I would say it’s one of the highest forms of love. And nothing is more comforting than knowing whatever befalls us, whatever conflict is gurgling inside of us, love prevails. When love prevails, joy does too. It’s an immutable law of the universe.

Which is why I’m so big on JOY. It’s fear’s faithful companion in the Hero’s Journey; the call to the Soul to express its true nature. By embracing what’s NOT working with kindness rather than with judgment, JOY looks for what is possible, opens dimensions of consciousness for fresh insight and new that solutions expand soul growth and greater effectiveness in life.

JOY means you’re true to the “real you” inside. The one that you’ll always be in discovery of. The one that lives in integrity with the law of nature, at one with itself and the universe.

JOY is always possible because it takes conflict and uses it to evolve consciousness.

There’s nothing more rewarding than that! No matter what’s going on, as we surrender to this inner quality inside, we make peace with our inner dragons and begin to tame them. That’s my definition of J.O.Y. – Just Open Yourself to this exquisite power inside. The sooner the better, for as the Course in Miracles reminds us:

Peace is our only goal and forgiveness is our only function.

Joy is not the fluffy stuff of unicorns and rainbows. It’s not surface. It’s deep. It’s strong because it’s emerged from transcending the sorrows of life. It knows that day always follow the night, so it trusts the light even when it can’t be seen. That’s joy. That’s the culmination of a deep, solid decision to trust life and be willing to continually face uncertainty with courage, grace, commitment and eventually, a sense of adventure.

Joy is the willingness to keep growing.
It’s the decision to embrace Beginner’s Mind, to cast ego pride aside, admit uncertainty and keep going anyway, learning how to walk in the new world with baby steps that include vulnerability, asking for help, many falls, scrapes and the infinite call to patience. Joy is knowing we are multi-dimensional, that everything really is okay, even when the ego insists it’s not. Joy is mindfulness, presence, and power rather than force.

In Stoicism, the Ancient Greek philosophy that emphasizes self-control, happiness or joy is defined as “eudaimonia” which means human flourishing and consists of growth, authenticity, meaning, and excellence. I’d say my definition of Joy is the same, it’s just a whole lot easier to spell . Like Stoicism, it speaks to the true nature of authenticity and the our evolution of expanding integrity and virtue of character. This is where joy and pain intersect. We’ll keep finding parts of ourselves that need to be surrendered to reveal the deeper authenticity within. I believe we do this best using joy – we will find all kinds of things that need to change, but joy’s response will be purposeful because it’s one of evolution. First we do things from love, then through love, then AS love. Joy identifies and releases patterns that don’t work, that keep us stuck in guilt or paralysis and makes healing possible.

Joy befriends the guilt. It provides safe passage for the pain to flow through. It is more interested in growth than being right. It’s not argumentative nor a perfectionist. Metaphorically, it likes to play in the dirt, in the imagination of mud pies that call to us when we take life too seriously.

So, the next time you find yourself wondering what happened to your joy. Know that it will come back. It didn’t go away, it’s still there, always in the background; you’ve just got some emotional processing to do. Painful emotions are a sign of growth and the reward is truly worth the effort. That’s why joy is not the absence of sorrow, it’s the sacred acceptance of it.

In the immortal words of poet William Blake, we find the seeds of resilience and true prosperity in this force of love called JOY:

Joy and woe are woven fine,
A clothing for the soul divine,
Under every grief and pine,
Runs a joy with silken twine.
It is right it should be so,
We were made for joy and woe,
And when this we rightly know,
Through the world we safely go.

 

Apr11

The Antidote to Stuckness

by Cheryl Brewster

How do you feel about your stuckness?

Are you like me? Where I feel stuck is in how I judge my stuckness. Intellectually I know that stuckness is an inevitable part of life. But oh, if I’m not paying attention, how I can get caught up in hating it! I hate it because of how it makes me feel; ineffective, weak, lacking, ridiculous, hypercritical – ugh – it just feels awful! How many of us are feeling stuck with the changes that the Covid-19 virus has precipitated?

Asking productive questions to catch the blind spots of habit is a powerful antidote. If I could develop ways of catching myself when I start sinking down into the depths of despair, think of the freedom that could take place! If I used how I judged myself as a path to greater awareness, I would be practicing transcendence, the art of spiritual awakening and just plain common sense. I would be mastering the ABCs of Intuition as a form of energy management and accomplish what my heart really, truly desires, no matter what the circumstances around me.

To use pain as a productive tool of transformation defies the conditioning, apathy, stupor, even the stupidity of mankind – it calls out the deprivation that would seek to harm and vanquish the very real battle we each face in determining, will my life stand for something meaningful or will I just “surface-live” because it’s more convenient? The ultimate question, really is, will I live my life for good or for evil? Evil is a lack of love, a diminishing of life, an ignorance that demands power and control at the expense of anyone and anything else. So here we are, over the past few weeks, facing the harsh reality of a species on the brink of possible cataclysmic failure if we do not wake up, and drop our individual and collective apathy on one side and need for control on the other.

Every single one of us needs to wake up. Many of us are, yet this one thing remains… the call to drop the judgment that keeps us prisoner to suppression of our personal authentic power.

Evil is the word “Live” spelled backwards. Judging our stuckness sends us straight to experiencing hell on earth – to the irrational acronym of G-U-I-L-T: Gut-wrenching, Useless, Insidious, Lies (and) Torment.

I refuse to contribute one second longer to the virus eating away at the sanctity of mankind. Yes, I will wash my hands; and just as importantly; I will wash my mind and my emotions of disempowering, harmful voices. I will take my stand and re-frame stuckness as the Law of Opposites at play; part of the natural rhythm of life. Instead of labeling stuckness as some horrible, terrible thing, I will choose to see it as the very important impasse or right of passage that creates and grooms a new way of thinking and being in this world. Stuckness is a part of the evolutionary phase that begs the question, will I react with judgment and condemnation or will I use it to rise into a higher consciousness? What could happen if stuckness was showing me something new that I hadn’t seen before? What if stuckness is nature’s way of saying there’s a better way? And isn’t that what’s facing us on rebuilding our lives and economy during and post corona virus? Isn’t the whole message one of coming back to what’s most important? And doesn’t that point us back to values that stand the test of time and a connecting back into community; that authentic sense of self and togetherness that ensures innovation, creativity and cooperation for a healthier planet and world?

Oh! The relief that comes with the release of the need to fight, to struggle, to continually feel defeated by inner and outer challenge!

In contemplating this in mediation, I had a vision of St. Francis of Assisi who reminded me that all great leaders have learned this one very important thing – to use stuckness as a catalyst for powerful, important change. Judgment and self-condemnation leading to “less than” thinking, is the virus that has been bred into us for centuries. It is the need for power and control, manipulation and economics that twist moral values, where consumerism has replaced the God of our hearts.

Let us rip away the twin masks of blame and shame and mirror instead, the possibilities of life, healing, innovation and progress that exist through challenges and obstacles. We live in a world that so desperately needs to come back to sanity. By choosing love as a commitment and principle to live by, no matter what, we can then practice the very important Stoic philosophy of “Amor Fati,” which means to embrace fate, to accept the reality of what is and productively use all adversity and obstacles as fuel for the fire of our potential!

So how you do you feel about your stuckness? Will it feed your potential rather than smother it? Will you join me in blessing it and practicing the message of the Easter Story; the message of forgiveness, death to apathy on one side and ego-control on the other? Will you join me in the most courageous act possible; the one of self-forgiveness that leads to loving the self as much as the Divine within? If not now, when? How much longer do we need to wait?

“Your Intention to Love, no matter what, is the absolute Key to Happiness” – Robert Holden

It’s so important that we use stuckness as the opportunity that it provides; to become aware of our negativity in judging it and therefore make the switch back to sanity; to positive reinforcement and the invitation to overcome through the transcendent power of love.

Negative self-accusations and questions lead us straight to creating Hell as our personal reality. As author Robert Holden pointed out in his book Happiness “Now, in H.E.L.L., all the letters stand alone: (the) Horrific Effect (of not enough) Love (and) Laughter, (waiting to be undone). In H.E.A.V.E.N. all the letters stand together: Happiness (next to) Eternity; Abundance, Vision, (and) Ease (joined to) Now (as one).”

In this pandemic we have the opportunity and responsibility to stop creating hell on earth and literally create a new earth. It will come by our individual and collective willingness to be live in deeper alignment with the laws of nature and spirituality – the law of love in action. As WW2 concentration camp survivor Victor Frankl noted, “the last of human freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

Choose well. Choose to use your own personal stuckness not as a stopping place, but a stepping stone into an attitude of grace, faith, fortitude and victory. Take Your Stand for what Inspires you and do it. Take Your Stand for what Empowers you and do it. Take Your Stand for values born out of compassion rather than consumerism. Forgive your past mistakes, embrace the wisdom they birthed, and step into a future with a fortified sense of commitment, compassion and vision. In the words of Albert Camus, find that invincible summer within yourself, that has the strength to hold the winter. Take Your Stand. There is a power inside of you that can and will handle anything thrown its way. Aware, Breathe, Connect to the Heart. We were born for these times, let us navigate them as nature intended. Let us transcend and live from this place of inner freedom that defies any and all attempts to vanquish it. Like the Easter Story, let us rise again… yes, let us rise! Intuition leads the way…. follow it.

Call to Action: Make the switch from the inner hyper-critical judge to the observer mind that sees the bigger picture. Observe your life like a movie…. what could happen in this moment by committing to love rather than fear? Notice the options that surface and choose that better feeling thought to make a new choice that empowers. This is your fork in the road. It’s in the tiniest of decisions and attitude adjustments that show us the way back home.

Inspiration: Canadian Choir of Women Physicians sings RISE AGAIN (virtually)

Rev. Cheryl Brewster, B.Msc.
I empower individuals and organizations to stay inspired and keep moving forward in positive, productive ways, no matter what changes, challenges or adversities they may face.

Personal and Business Intuitive, Consultant/Training/Keynotes/ specializing in:
Intuition in Business, Radical Joy through Conflict Resolution/Communication/
Resiliency Skills, Ordained Minister/Wedding Officiant and Life Celebrant

Mar24

In Times of Crisis, Step Up Into Grace

by Cheryl Brewster

You can and are making a difference by paying attention to your intuition, and practicing self-care. Your intuition is destiny calling. We were made for this times, let’s use our uncertainty and vulnerability to step up into Grace to support the birth of this new earth.

I’m writing this blog shortly after global states of emergency have been called… my heart breaks. Our world is being held hostage by the ravages of a virus that kills on so many levels. This can go two ways;  we can step up – contribute, connect and create necessary change, or we can get distracted and remain powerless. Historically, we are surrounded in a world gone mad with consumerism on one side and manipulation and control on the other. Both are steeped in ignorance and a refusal to support ethical living based on the simplicity of prosperity for all, kindness, community and compassion.

No more!

No longer can we afford the luxury of pretending and postponing reality. It’s here. And it hurts. Time therefore for individual and collective reflection and course-correction. It’s obvious that that at this critical time in history, we have the opportunity and obligation to bring about massive and necessary change. But that change will only be possible and sustainable by us each taking personal responsibility for how we choose to respond

We are connected as individuals to mass consciousness, which means that metaphorically,  each one of us has and continues to, create our own heaven or hell on earth by the assumptions and conclusions that determine our life experience. What if…

  1. Ethically: What if I am on the planet at this particular time to usher in a new wave of consciousness?
  2. Economically: As fear comes up, what if I am here to release my own fears “on behalf” of my loved ones? What if I am here to give to myself, the comfort I want them to have… innovation, creativity and confidence to establish a prosperity consciousness.
  3. Intellectually: What if I really “got” that trusting my intuition is the voice of reason, here to source practical solutions?
  4. Emotionally: What if rather than shutting down or going into panic, I give my feelings safe passage, I bless them as they move through me, to find the comfort and acknowledgment they need.
  5. Spiritually:What if, I’m here to embrace my own struggle with kindness and compassion and “step up into Grace” so that I can effectively support others in healthy ways without losing myself or draining my own cup dry?”
  6. Practically: What if I practiced consistency with the Mindful Minute and the ABCs of Intuition to keep me resilient in the “new normal” so that I can still live confidently, creatively and peacefully?
  7. In Community:  What if, I am here to use prayer and intention circles, to  share the power of healing and encouragement that we all need. (Check this website and resource page for audio recordings, online workshops and free inspirational talks).

This is a time of great spiritual awakening and as we each do our part in “stepping up into Grace” – we turn challenges into opportunities. We must be diligent in what we “choose” to create and how we wish to respond to inevitable crisis and uncertainty. We must come together in community to support each other as we adapt physically, psychologically and emotionally to strengthen our immune systems on all levels. Take good care, practice physical, spiritual and emotional hygiene  and continue to open your heart for the Grace that supports you managing the waves of change by creating your own that bless and serve.

Click here for the audio file “Mindful Minutes Even in States of Emergency”

I hope this blog has supported you at this particular time and look forward to supporting you further in the online talks and programs. Check my calendar here to stay updated and be sure to sign up for Daily Inspiration and my newsletter to stay connected.

 

Rev. Cheryl Brewster, B.Msc.
I empower individuals and organizations to stay inspired and keep moving forward in positive, productive ways, no matter what changes, challenges or adversities they may face.

Personal and Business Intuitive, Consultant/Training/Keynotes/ specializing in:
Intuition in Business, Radical Joy through Conflict Resolution/Communication/
Resiliency Skills, Ordained Minister/Wedding Officiant and Life Celebrant

 

 

Apr19

The Obstacle is the Way: When Challenge Becomes Inspiration

by Cheryl Brewster

Feeling discouraged or overwhelmed with life’s challenges? Try this… it works! Amor Fati  is a term from Stoic philosophy that is an absolute lifesaver. It means to embrace your fate… to make the best out of anything that happens, treating each and every moment—no matter how challenging—as something to be embraced, not avoided. To not only be okay with it, but love it and be better for it, so that like oxygen to a fire, obstacles and adversity become fuel for our potential.

The whole idea of Stoic philosophy is based on the word virtue, which is another word for strength, by living in alignment with nature.  In my experience, a critical prerequisite that makes the idea of amor fati even remotely possible, is self-compassion. If you are highly intuitive, empathic, a caregiver, emotionally sensitive, have experienced trauma or have a  tendency to avoid conflict, (sounds like all of us), this is especially important. When faced with challenge, our biology can take over and the amygdala part of our brain takes us straight into fight, flight or freeze. We lose the ability to intuit or think clearly. We put ourselves at risk for losing rational thought by either going numb and shutting down, or blowing up and blowing things out of proportion.  It’s pretty hard to practice amor fati, when all this is going on! It’s called an “amygdala hijack.”

Science defines this hijack of our limbic system,  as an immediate, overwhelming emotional response that comes with a later realization: that the response was inappropriately strong given the trigger. Compassion for self helps to create a pattern interrupt in this biological, chemical explosion… it says, wait a minute, you’re getting upset, what’s going on here, what unmet needs are asking for attention right now, what do you need? This is a form of amor fati… redirecting overwhelm into something more constructive.

Stop the Amygdala Hijack in its Tracks!
  1. Know the signs: Get familiar with the the body sensations that indicate something’s coming up (like a racing heart, sweaty palms, that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach, dizziness, etc.)
  2. Take 3 relaxed breaths to chill – it takes approximately six seconds for the chemicals spewing out from the amygdala to dissipate
  3. Your hand on your heart prompts the release of the oxytocyn, an anti-stress hormone that lowers, blood pressure and cortisol levels
  4. Re-frame uncomfortable feelings by seeing them as chemical reactions taking place in the body; don’t judge! Part of what gets us into trouble, keeping us stuck in these emotional vortexes is self-blame. Of course you have emotional triggers… they are a part of your biology. Use compassion to give them a safe place to land. They’re allowed to be here, even if (especially if) you don’t like them. With kindness rather than judgement, the tidal wave of emotion begins to  dissipate, the overcharged amygdala calms down, so sound reasoning and intuition can be accessed once again. It takes time, but it works. Besides, nothing is more rewarding than transforming chronic worry, anxiety or irrational guilt and thinking distortions.
  5. Create some time for evaluation: sit down and engage your logic with writing – the logical brain wants to help sort through the situation – make a list of what you’ve learned about yourself, and how you can apply insights for future application
  6. Keep practicing being okay with what is, without wanting it to be any different. When we adopt the duo of self-compassion and amor fati as a lifestyle change, we stay more present, enjoying life, and being empowered by it, even when it’s difficult. We work with what we can control, rather than exhausting ourselves with what we can’t. We reverse energy drains to energy gains, and that’s hugely important, to stay on the pathway of living our potential no matter what the circumstances.

This is a game-changer; What a way to live and work… when challenge becomes inspiration and stays that way! Empowerment is strength, the outcome of living in alignment with nature, sound reasoning and your intuition. Contact me if this blog has stirred questions or insights for you or your work teams. By converting challenge to inspiration, we empower individuals and workplaces with resiliency, vision and team work.

“Disempowerment is the nemesis of intuition because it allows the subconscious to protect you from the truths you need to be listening for. Alternatively, when you practice empowerment, your intuitive information will follow in abundance.” – Laura Day

Rev. Cheryl Brewster, B.Msc.
I empower individuals and organizations to stay inspired and keep moving forward in positive, productive ways, no matter what changes, challenges or adversities they may face.

Personal and Business Intuitive, Consultant/Training/Keynotes/ specializing in:
Intuition in Business, Radical Joy through Conflict Resolution/Communication/
Resiliency Skills, Ordained Minister/Wedding Officiant and Life Celebrant

 

 

 

Dec24

Harness the Untapped Power of Procrastination

by Cheryl Brewster

Do you find yourself running into perfectionism? Those debilitating stopping places where no matter how hard you try, you just can’t seem to bust through? Me too.  Instead of fighting procrastination,  the tendency to keep putting things off that I find uncomfortable, I’ve come to see it as an early warning detection system that I can use productively. In fact, procrastination can be saying that “it’s time for another adventure.”

  1. Procrastination shows up when I’m challenging myself, so yay me! It’s the confirmation and encouragement to bust outside comfort zones and the natural fear of failure inherent in change
  2. It’s the psyche’s way of inviting more creatively and authentically, not bound by old rules of perfectionism. This targets more focus and depth and I’m better able to drop the habitual “negative memory bias” of the primal brain’s need to protect at all costs
  3. Procrastination can be alerting me to low energy which needs to be rectified; it forces me to stop and ask the question; if I’m not in flow right now, what will help me get there?
  4. Procrastination can be interpreted as intuition’s call to be more present. By taking a “Mindful Minute” to check-in, I’m acknowledging and centering myself into a more nurturing state of acceptance. I get to enjoy this moment rather than dread it;  I get to change my focus from limitation to the quantum field of infinite possibilities.
  5. Procrastination is s a sure sign that it’s time to exchange judgment and self-recrimination for gratitude and appreciation, otherwise life becomes all work and no play; always striving but never arriving, and that’s not fun at all. In fact, the blessing in procrastination in many ways, is the call to more empowered states.

The research on gratitude, kindness and appreciation is astonishing and the antidote to procrastination and perfectionism. 

Thoughts of kindness and gratitude take us out of survival mode and into thriving. At the University of Zurich, a study demonstrated that when you display kindness or compassion, a hormone called oxytocin shuts down the survival centers in the brain’s amygdala. Since the amygdala is wired for four basic emotions: fear/anxiety, sadness/pain, anger/aggression and love/joy, oxytocin “cools off” the brain circuits that are wired for survival, leaving a love and joy for life. From this state, we’ve got access to expanded states of consciousness that invite flow, creativity and solutions we can’t see when we are in survival mode.

Gratitude and appreciation return us to logic of clear thinking and the ability to master unhelpful and destructive emotions.  As Nassim Taleb, a scholar on uncertainty noted, “real strength lies in the control or the domestication of one’s emotions, not in pretending they don’t exist.”

So the next time you go into the “spin cycle” of procrastination with its inherent subtle and not so subtle feelings, habits, conscious and unconscious programs, remember… every challenge contains within it, the solution. Even procrastination therefore, serves a productive purpose and the sooner we leverage it, the better we feel, the deeper we go into the joy of creativity, authentic living and the fulfillment of creative desire and accomplishment.

Call to action: the next time procrastination or fear of failure comes up for you, consider using it as your early warning detection system, alerting you to self-kindness, appreciation and gratitude to birth something new. You’ll be glad you did.

If you enjoyed this article, let us know! Share your insights and experiences as you “harness the power of procrastination” to live more creatively and authentically, with better results and greater joy.

Sep13

Stay Alive All Your Life!

by Cheryl Brewster

If there’s a wish that we all had, whether it’s career success, love in relationship or living our fullest potential, underneath each and every wish and goal would be the utter recognition and joy of being alive. That sense of aliveness, of awesomeness in the present moment, whether circumstances are easy or difficult, is the evolutionary consciousness at work in each one of us.  It’s actually the “real us” and what we are really looking for… so often we think we’ll find it in externals; but we won’t because it’s already inside us.  Our external world, therefore becomes the stage upon which we express this ultimate, glorious, inner power that is our great calling.  Albert Camus said it best:

“My dear, In the midst of hate, I found there was, within me, an invincible love.
In the midst of tears, I found there was, within me, an invincible smile.
In the midst of chaos, I found there was, within me, an invincible calm.
I realized, through it all, that… In the midst of winter,
I found there was, within me, an invincible summer.
And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger – something better, pushing right back.”

Isn’t this an elegant description of the awe and wonder available to us in each moment, especially in managing change! That inner strength that defies the pain, tragedy and sorrow of life  can be more of our everyday experience. Consider your own life.  Out of the deepest, darkest experiences, will also come fresh new beginnings. Life rarely turns out the way we think it will and hard times can knock us out of the saddle; at times we’re left lying broken and winded on the ground. Life can hurt. A lot. And when we’re in the grit of that knife-edge; when we want to give up on our dreams, we enter the dark night of the soul.  It’s as if we’ve used up our old world, but we must not lose hope that a new one is arriving. This is the time when honest introspection, although hard, allows something more deeply authentic to arrive. It is in this moment of pain, that we have an incredible opportunity to transfer the heavy dullness of a lack-luster trend back to feeling and staying alive. From Camus: “But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?” 

In his book “Get Happy Now,” Joseph McLendon III describes a fabulous process to stay aligned with this harmony, which I’ve modified slightly here:

  1. Recognize that every time we feel a heavy or negative thought or feeling inside of us, we can use it as leverage back to this place of aliveness
  2. That “less than” feelings are indicators of past conditioning that are  ripe and ready for release
  3. Release comes more easily and consistently by, choosing a power word to interrupt habitual focus of  these”less than” feelings
  4. In that interrupt, engaging body movement like punching the air with our power word, and jumping up and down or dancing to some goofy moves, creates a momentary gap that has surprised or shocked us out of past conditioning and into the present.
  5. In that moment we tap into the power of that invincible summer within us; we mentally envision and physically/emotionally see, hear, feel and move as the person we really want to be, right here, right now. We visualize the fulfillment of that desire and feel it NOW. Recalling past successes and peak experiences engages the existing neuron pathways wired for success. Adding a smile that activates the vega nerve releases feel-good chemicals into the body to create a state change on all levels…. physiologically we are integrating the joy of life, our own unique energy system on all levels; physically, emotionally, cognitively, spiritually and intuitively. Add a smile, snap your fingers, use your arms to draw a wide circle in front of you while shouting the word “Magnificent!”
  6. This is called anchoring; combining high emotion with a clear mental image of ourselves and/or our goals, with physical movement. Just snapping your fingers can be an excellent anchor to instantly create a state change of “staying alive” and living from your invincible summer
  7. Give yourself a pat on the back as an additional, final anchor to celebrate the successes of this moment, like “way to go, or “I did it!”
  8. Perform at least five times a day consecutively for 10 days and soon, the ability to leverage heavy or negative-feeling emotion/thoughts becomes automatic… now we’re talking quantum field where the ability to take action becomes more automatic and effortless
  9. Hand write (yes by hand, not typed), a script and read out loud daily, with feeling

One of my favorite scripts that I’ve collected through the years (this one again by McLendon), is called My Magnificent Day:
“I’m healthy, happy, and full of joy and excitement. I smile most of the time and I’m excited about the future to come. I’m enjoying the energy that I have and the friends that I have the privilege of being in my life. I am grateful beyond measure for all of the many blessings that I have in my life and I am ecstatic about the ones to come. My greatest joy is helping others see their happiness and glow with positive energy and expectancy.”

I’ve found the greatest success by creating my own visualizations to capture my goals and creating a morning ritual of waking up to feelings of enthusiasm to create my day. I then read my personal script out loud, with feeling. The profound power of this simple tool is ridiculously enjoyable, easy, fun and SMART! It gets results. It’s vibrancy of life that Norman Vincent Peal so eloquently describes as enthusiasm:

“Many often accept the humdrum life without making a fight for a better one. We think in a downbeat way that maybe we just don’t deserve more. One of the greatest human needs of our time is a weapon to fight mediocrity, one that teaches us how to make sure of zest and vitality and the creative forces buried deep within us. Enthusiasm makes the difference between success and failure.”

Call to action:
So often we postpone or delay our peace and happiness.  We live humdrum, mediocre lives. We get caught up in the past where guilt lives. Use guilt productively; it’s a flashing beacon letting you know things have to change…. drop the past by using the physiology of anchoring to get you back into your body, and use it to enjoy this place of invincible summer inside you. What happens when right here, right now, you take just one minute to walk through the exercise above? You’ll feel better and be on your way to enjoying a more magnificent day, enjoying the awe and wonder of you. You will be “staying alive all your life,” deepening personal effectiveness and self-worth.

If you enjoyed this blog, let us know! And check out the services offered to support you in this very important and powerful process.

To your magnificence as a Conscious Changemaker and the continued mastery of stress management.

 

Jul12

Is it time for a Self-Care Makeover?

by Cheryl Brewster

Energy. We love it. It makes us feel good. When we have it, we enjoy life and get more done with less hassle and more ease. It makes sense then, to think the thoughts and do the things that energize us. However, as we know, day to day living and unforeseen events can distract us and take huge withdrawals from our energy reserves. If we’re not careful, an overdrawn energy account becomes the norm rather than the exception. Before you know it, we’re running on fumes. Literally. And that’s not fun. Left unchecked, burn-out and its twin sisters fatigue and exhaustion come to visit and it feels like they’ll never leave. It can seem like we’ve lost ourselves, and the ability to bounce back to previous energy levels can be challenging.

I know. I’ve been there. Big time. We all have or will at some point in our lives. However, the essential wisdom that can arise, if we’re open to it, is pure gold. Out of great tragedy can come great triumph, out of great pain; purpose, and out of great confusion; clarity. It’s why I’m so passionate about the work I do… as each of us re-frames what drains us into what empowers us, miracles of being and doing occur. We become living legacies! So it’s important to ask:

  • Are your self-care strategies solid?
  • Are you evolving them to step into your greater potential?
  • How often do you use them?
  • Are they working?
  • What stops you?
  • In the changing fortunes of time and circumstances, asking “why” self-care is important, you anchor the deeper meaning of your life. That personal anchor is important. It needs to be strong so that no matter what the seas of life are doing, you’re equipped for the weather. Nothing is more exhilarating.

Self-care isn’t selfish, it’s essential.  It’s about actively looking after your own health and well-being, so that you have the energy to support the people and the things you love. To commit to self-care is to value yourself, your loved ones, your calling and your profession. Not holding your self-care as sacred, important and meaningful short-changes the very people you’ve sworn to protect and the very fabric of your soul. From my perspective as a professional intuitive, self-care is a life-long discovery and practice that supports the purpose of the life-time.

Self-care “IS” energy – it’s the ground in which the five cornerstones of life; health, relationships, career, community and Self are fed or famished. Compassion fatigue is a risk found not only in the care and wellness industries, but in every avenue of life; if we stretch ourselves too thin, a chronic depletion begins to occur. We must interrupt that pattern.

Feeling good about yourself and your life is energizing. To be really effective in supporting your loved ones and your community, is the willingness to master what is de-energizing. That’s the fast-track to more energy. It may not make sense to the logical mind, but we’re not talking theory here… we’re talking about the quality of your life!

Need more energy? Choose thoughts and activities that energize. From Stoicism (an ancient philosophy of self-control that overcomes destructive emotions that drain energy) we learn that:

  • If an event happened, then it was meant to happen, and we are meant to make the best of it.We don’t get to choose what happens to us, but we can always choose how we want to feel about it.
  • Feelings are emotional energy and nothing is more energizing than using obstacles to our advantage. From that perspective, every event in our life holds a sovereignty that supports us. Everything. We transform victim into victory.

Recent studies from a university from North Carolina show that “acceptance coping” contributes to “post-traumatic growth.” People whose lives had been totally devastated were not only able to move through it, but go in a new direction. As Peter Levine, trauma expert has said…

 “Trauma is a fact of life, it doesn’t have to be a life sentence.”

Energizing declarations calm down the flight/fight response of the brain’s amygdula and are super simple and effective in replenishing lost energy. But you must be firm. You must be a warrior with your own mind. Use these energizing declarations to divert energy from drain to gain:

  • What once stopped me now advances me, so I choose to be kind to myself and accepting of this moment.
  • Events don’t matter as much as my response to them , so I choose to…
  • I use all circumstances to my advantage which means…

Call to action: repeat, repeat, repeat… baby steps advance big results… be patient and be willing to see time as your friend – drop expectations of things needing to be a certain way, and use them to your advantage by being at peace with the journey.  See your life as the work in progress that it is. Creating effective self-care strategies is like highway construction; it’s messy work, there will be plenty of delays and detours, and it takes time. But with vision, commitment and the proper set of energizing strategies that feed the soul, a new super highway is built. And that highway is your personal unstoppable resilience and your personal path to freedom.

About Cheryl Brewster, B.Msc., Transformational Speaker, Intuitive Consultant and Life Coach: Under every difficulty is a greater inner potential that our intuition accesses. My expertise is equipping my clients, whether individuals or organizations with self-care strategies as a path to success.  If you’d like to learn how my intuitive consults, coaching programs or speaking services, can support that, please contact me for a complimentary exploratory call.   As an interfaith ordained minister,  I also offer spiritual counselling and officiate ceremonies for life’s most meaningful moment.

May31

Resilience: The Tension of Opposites

by Cheryl Brewster

Resiliency is the ability to bounce back and stay more centered through life’s difficult events. It is our capacity to manage change, using it to feed our souls, even after it feels like we’ve been drained dry.  Remembering this, especially when it’s hard, helps us make sense of our worlds when they feel chaotic.

Your personal resilience (or lack of it) reveals where you are taking an honest look at your  reality.  Challenge will create a tension of opposites. and this tension is designed to support you being true to you. This intuitive resilience is built in to all of us and is tied to the magnificence of your Soul. Its job is to ensure that you honestly, actively identify and honour your own needs as you take care of others and life’s responsibilities.

What’s important to remember about resilience, and the “tension of opposites?” Our commitment to personal resilience will always help us grow from challenge or adversity. Just as “need is the mother of invention,” challenge is the mother of resilience. Making peace with these apparent opposites is where our power to excel gains quantum fuel. What makes a magnet so powerful is the opposing forces that result in a powerful magnetic energy field. The same is true of resilience:

  • Confusion leads to clarity
  • Boredom creates innovation
  • Pain can feed productive purpose
  • Anger reveals where change needs to happen
  • A lack of energy can reveal the need for more creativity
  • Challenge can feed enthusiasm
  • Creativity transforms resistance
  • Difficulty can reveal easier ways of doing things
  • Struggle births flow

So the next time, you go through something difficult, and start experiencing the “opposite of resilience,” which would be a lack of energy, or not feeling creative or capable, try a “One-Minute Resiliency Recharge.”  Your true desires are being revealed; you need to find out what they are! Set a timer for one minute and:

  • Be Curious: How could this current challenge compliment, rather than oppose or contradict what you’re trying to do?
  • Be Aware: Where are you losing energy? What will help you gain it back?
  • Be Wise: If the tension of opposites supports resilience, what is the new insight or action that is being revealed here?
  • Be Creative: How is this showing you to think, be and act in more empowered ways?
  • One of my all-time favourite “Mindful Minutes”  is to ask myself…. “what would happen if…”
    I chose to be ____________________ about what’s happening (and drawing from my favourite list of words, like: enthusiastic, creative, bold, daring, smart, cheeky, happy, peaceful, confident, successful, enlightened), etc.Robert Fritz echoes this in his book The Path of Least Resistance:

“From this choice the meaning of the word desire changes for you, from “idle wishes and hopes” to “true vision of that which is the highest in human aspiration and vision… as you learn to master your own creative process, you develop a capacity for truth. Good, bad, or indifferent, you will still want to know accurately what is going on.”

The more accurately we can “read” our own lives, complete with strengths and shadow, the more we grow our awareness, intuition and confidence to act.

Call to Action: How will you use the Tension of Opposites to recharge resilience? Email me, I’d love to hear about your experience!
About Cheryl Brewster, B.Msc., Transformational Speaker, Intuitive Consultant and Life Coach: Under every difficulty is a greater inner potential that our intuition accesses. My expertise is inspiring my clients, whether individuals or organizations to re-frame difficulty as a path to tangible, measurable results.  If you’d like to learn how my intuitive consults, coaching programs or speaking services, can support your success, please contact me for a complimentary exploratory call.   As an interfaith ordained minister,  I also offer spiritual counselling and officiate ceremonies for life’s most meaningful moments.

Apr27

Getting Things Done: Heaven or Hell?

by Cheryl Brewster

Are you creating heaven or hell in your daily duties, projects and priorities?
Wouldn’t it be great to “have fun to get more done?”
We’re usually taught the opposite… that we can’t have fun, “until” it is done.

Rumi’s wisdom reminds us of the power of choice we have:
The world exists as you perceive it.
It is not what you see, it is how you see it.
It is not what you hear, but how you hear it.
It is not what you feel, but how you feel it.

  • If the world exists as I perceive it,  then “having” to get things done, can take on its own form of hell
  • Yet we do this to ourselves all the time through over and under commitment
  • However as Carl Jung says, “no tree, it is said can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell,” which means that we live in a world of paradox and it’s important to make peace with that paradox and find its sweet spot.

One way of doing that is to realize, that we have an inner stillness inside, that has never been disturbed and never can be. This inner  success mechanism is our essence… even when it “appears” not  to be.  Daily calibrating to this higher frequency inside of us, along with daily clearing of old limiting beliefs are essential to our well-being and our productivity.

  1. It’s not what you see but how you see it.
    Take a look at your “to do list” today. How you see it can be from a place of:
    …worry; I’ll never get things done (aka, stress!)
    …confusion; I don’t even know what to do/what to start first (aka, panic which leads to paralysis which leads to procrastination.)
    …frustration; how can I get anything done when I’m  not well and don’t have the energy? (aka, helplessness which leads to despair.)

I find it helpful to work with “The Law of Opposites” to come back to a more balanced perspective. As Neal Donald Walsh, author of Conversations with God notes: As soon as you decide who and what you are, everything unlike it will come into the space… you may choose to see this “opposite” as a gift bearer, bringing you a chance to experience and express peace or as a thief, stealing your peace from you.

Rather than judge ourselves for not getting enough done, or missing something, we can remember to declare our “Stand” for what we do want, so that when the opposite shows up, we see it as a gift of growth through self-inquiry. Using Rumi’s wisdom and asking, how am I really seeing this situation can now change the entire experience! Joe Dispenza teaches in his “Create Your Day” philosophy:  “The reason nothing changes is because you have not mastered self-observation.” The more we follow that self-observation, the more we can appreciate how our innate wisdom, our intuition, is guiding us into greater states of flow.

If you are finding yourself trying to be super effective only to find yourself losing ground, then take heart! Self-observation is key, and when the Law of Opposites shows up in your life, remember that it is here to HELP you! Apply Rumi’s timeless wisdom and ask your own reflective questions; here are some samples;

The world exists as you perceive it.  (Is this the world I really want to keep creating?)
It is not what you see, it is how you see it.  (Am I looking through the eyes of heaven or hell, through love or fear?)
It is not what you hear, but how you hear it.  (Am I hearing this objectively or taking it personally?)
It is not what you feel, but how you feel it.  (Am I feeling this with compassion or with loathing)?

  • Take Your Stand for what inspires you.
  • Use that inspiration when the law opposites show up
  • See the law of opposites as the gift-bearer of choice: will you see it as a way to express peace or as a thief that steals peace from you?

Our perceptions do create our realty. In each moment, we have the opportunity to take personal responsibility for more empowered living.  We begin to see where we are not victims of our circumstances… in fact, the opposite is true… we are dynamic and victorious when we use the Law of Opposites for what it’s meant for. As Neale Donald Walsch so eloquently writes: “you will rejoice because you will see “opposition” as a sure and certain sign – that you are on the journey of transformation; the road to glory; the higher path.” He echoes Rumi’s timeless wisdom with his own:

“If, at any given moment, you are being afraid, it is because you choose to be.

If you are being joyful, it is because you choose to be.

If you are being annoyed, it is because you choose to be.

If you are being harassed it is because you choose to be.

If you are being loved, it is because you choose to be.

If you are being ignored it is because you choose to be.

If you are being helped, it is because you choose to be.

If you are being hurt, it is because you choose to be.

If you are being wise, it is because you choose to be.

If you are feeling wronged, it is because you choose to be.

This list could go on forever. Indeed… it actually does.”

Call to Action: How will you use the Law of Opposites in getting things done? Email me, I’d love to hear about your experience!

woman_speaking_to_audience

About Cheryl Brewster, B.Msc., Transformational Speaker, Intuitive Consultant and Life Coach: Under every difficulty is a greater inner potential that our intuition accesses. My expertise is inspiring my clients, whether individuals or organizations to re-frame difficulty as a path to tangible, measurable, powerful results and solutions in the areas of life and business that matter most.  If you’d like to learn how my intuitive consults, coaching programs or speaking services, can support your success, please contact me for a complimentary exploratory call.   As an interfaith ordained minister,  I also offer spiritual counselling and officiate ceremonies for life’s most meaningful moments.

Mar15

How to Live Your “Calling”

by Cheryl Brewster

Do you have a “calling“? That deep sense of purpose or urge within you that “must” be explored.

Are you:

  • Feeling a shift coming; a hint of something new that hasn’t quite arrived yet?
  • Already working on your passion with great enthusiasm but results are taking longer than expected leaving you with a feeling of stagnation?
  • Feeling that your life is in the doldrums… not much is happening and you’re not sure what to do?

These occasions can be very unsettling and we can begin to:

  • Doubt ourselves and the bigger picture of our lives.
  • Give up hope and slip into confusion or despair.
  • Romanticize about the good old days before we followed our passion.
  • Feel anxiety about our future, regret decisions and condemn mistakes from the past.

In short, when things get difficult or seem to have run their course, we get scared and shut down. But we need to do the opposite; we must keep our hearts open.

Gregg Levoy in his book entitled “Callings” describes this ebb and flow beautifully:
“We love to quote the philosopher and poet Goethe who said that “whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. But we forget that he also said, “To put your ideas into action is the most difficult thing in the world.”

And from poet Stanley Kuntiz: “The poem in the head is always perfect. The challenge comes when we try to convert it into language. This is especially so when we discover, as we often do that saying yes to a calling requires not just one act of heroism and risk-taking, but a prolonged period of action that can stretch into years.”

We must remember this when things get hard. We must continue to “take our stand” for our callings. Our callings have two fundamental features to them; they give great meaning to our lives… and they always come with a way through. But we must listen to that intuitive heart centre to find our way!  So how do we stay open to our callings and the new directions they take us in?

6 Simple Steps to Feed the Calling of Your Soul

1. Know Thyself!
Philosopher J. Krishnamurti reminds us that “the mind is the result of the known; it is the result of the past.” This past includes the limitations of a conditioned mind. In order to free ourselves from those limitations, we must be willing to see what’s ineffective in our thinking and release it. Observe yourself – watch how consciously or unconsciously you do things… as awareness and self acceptance increase, so does authentic personal power. These “aha” moments of, “oh, that’s what I really do” are life-changing when we follow through on them.

2. Practice Silence
An occupied mind is a busy mind, too full for anything new, original or creative. Mindfulness steeped in self-compassion keeps the heart and mind open to receive insight. Receiving equals energy – this is critical for those prolonged periods of action that our callings require. Practice silence by moving attention away from a busy, consumed mind, and instead, into the quiet, the stillness.

3. Practice “one-minute comfort breathing”
Risk taking and heroism arise from your bigger sense of self  – your “little I” will be challenged… expect that and be prepared for it.  A breathing exercise that brings immense comfort is “breathing in, I see the me that is uncertain.  Breathing out, I smile a hug into it.”

4. Use fear to your advantage
As Thich Nhat Hanh encourages, “we have the power to look deeply at our fears, and then fear cannot control us. Fearlessness is not only possible, it is the ultimate joy. When you touch nonfear, you are free.”  How do we touch nonfear? Accept yourself as you are now, while simultaneously dropping self-defeating thoughts. We tend to think we’d be free if we didn’t experience fear, but that’s just not the case! If you can be free even though you have uncomfortable feelings, then you really are free! Let’s face it, there’s always going to be something that challenges us, but when you’re not overcome by those uncomfortable feelings, you really are free. So now, we are giving birth to impertability – we begin to cultivate a mind that is beyond disturbance.

5. Practice “what if”
What’s that one thing you’ve been really wanting to do but you’ve been putting off? What will you feel like when it’s done? Just a few minutes visualizing that can free up the energy to take that one first step… and then another, and another.

6. Be strategic with intuition
What does your soul need to replenish itself? If you took just one mindful minute right now to ask that question… you would be tapping into the energy of your calling… you’d be cultivating the wisdom and strength required to do the most difficult thing possible… put your ideas into the world. And that is the joy of living your calling – Take Your Stand!

Call to Action:
Rather than judge your emotions as good or bad…. see them all as equally important. Enjoy experimenting with the steps above and share your experience with me… I’d love to hear from you. Or better yet, if you are new to my work, let’s book a complimentary 15 minute exploratory session. And if you are an existing client and it’s been a while since we’ve connected, let’s get you in for that one-on-one session or workshop to explore and rejuvenate your stand with complimentary 15 minute post session follow-up!

If you enjoyed this article, let us know! Individuals and organizations find Cheryl Brewster’s expertise as a Professional Intuitive, Transformational Speaker and Coach refreshing and timely. Her private clients experience greater clarity and confidence in taking action during transition. In her corporate workshops, Cheryl inspires focus and follow-through. To explore her work further, visit TheIntuitiveLife.com or email cheryl@theintuitivelife.com.